Fact Vs. Opinion

Have you ever thought if you are living you life by facts or by opinions or have you given thought that how does this actually impact your life ?

Understanding the difference between Opinions and facts is important for several reasons. But this post is particularly concerned with one factor – the disturbance that can be avoided in daily life just by understanding and practicing this difference. We need to know two things:

1. What is the difference between the two
2. Why is this difference important and what happens when this difference is taken for granted.

What is the difference between opinions and facts?

A fact is something that can be proved. It is something that has evidence to support it. For Example: “Elephants are herbivorous animal”, this statement is a fact because it is supported by evidence. But a statement like “Delhi is the better place to live in India than Mumbai” is an opinion. Opinions might be supported by evidence or might not get supported by evidence. But Facts are always supported by Evidence/s. Some readers might need more examples; so for them I am presenting a small table below:

	Facts	Opinions
1	That AIDS is caused by transmission of infected blood.	That AIDS is caused by touching the infected person.
2	That congress (I) won the general elections in India in 2009 for the second consecutive time.	That the Congress (I) deserves to be the ruling party.
3	A balanced Vegetarian diet has multiple health benefits.	Being a non vegetarian is fashionable.
4	That cats are carnivorous animals.	That cats are “bad” animals.

Modern day science is based on facts. Science cannot rely upon opinions although doctors, scientists like everyone else can have a “difference of opinions”. So it wouldn’t be wrong if I say that our modern day life and all the benefits that we grab from modern science today are all because of the “Facts” that were gathered by some hard working people and NOT opinions. People whose opinions are based on facts are more sort of rational persons. On the contrary people who rest a majority of actions and behaviors on “opnions”which are different from what is factual might have to deal with a lot of maladjustments. Yes they have the right to do so, but then they should be taking the responsibility to bear the consequences.

Don’t facts deserve more respect and attention that they generally get? Why in our daily life do we take for granted the importance and meaning of facts? The same facts which have almost gifted us our life!!

Opinions can be misleading !!

Every one of us has opinions. Just having an opinion which differs from the facts does not make such a difference. The biggest mistakes are made when the most important decisions of life are made based on such opinions and not facts!When all the major actions, behaviors and lifestyle decisions are based on opinions and not facts. I might not like a fact or I might not agree with it, but I cannot refute it. Trying to refute it will mean that I am trying to swim against the flow of the river. One day I was having a conversation with someone, who was of the opinion that the best way to discipline children is to hit them. I pointed it out to him that there is evidence and now it is a well accepted fact that there are numerous researches which show that hitting does not help in the long run, further it has also been proved (therefore a matter of fact) that “Reinforcements” always work better than “punishments” in the domain of Behavior Modification. But this man would not budge! In fact he was trying to refute all the studies. But I have encountered such people many times who would not think twice before trying to refute facts. I have given a deep thought to the reasons for this behavior. Though I have still failed to understand this behavior completely I drew the following two conclusions:

1. Since they have held these opinions for a long time, they find it difficult to listen and accept something new that does not match their thinking; the main cause for which is “EGO” (and there can be multiple emotional reasons).
2. Relying upon facts is not as important to them, as their personal opinions about the issue. So, they do not believe in relying upon facts and evidences.

An example: Assuming that he uses this technique to discipline his children, He probably is not at all aware about the consequences of standing for his opinions against the facts. Like in this case where physical punishment is used the child runs at a risk of developing a low self esteem OR the child also might be on a risk to be turn into a rebellion. Human reactions can never be guaranteed. The central question is that - If his children start showing signs of ill psychological health later in life, will he take responsibility to cause them this pain and loss ? OR instead, will he blame his children for their behavior ?

As I said, in most cases reactions cannot be guaranteed, therefore there are very few laws in Psychology. But if we all were to deny what has been systematically proved by a full fledged science, are we not being foolish in keeping our opinions above science ?

If you are thinking that this man is being harsh, let me present you a worse example: many daughter in laws in India get very extremely maltreated, here is one major reason - that she is repeatedly gives birth to only a girl child (boys have traditionally been regarded highly in orthodox Indian societies) though there can be many reasons for such maltreatment. In this case the contrasting fact that has been taken for granted is that - Male child is always a result of a “Y” chromosome which comes only from the father and “never” the mother. There are innumerable examples of how peoples opinions {which are often baseless) can create so many problems for them, for the others and for the society as a whole. If I say that Indian culture today has become very unscientific, will it be a fact or an opinion? If an opinion then what category opinion?

An opinion based action is not always wrong or harmful. Opinions can be of three types:

A. Independent opinions that yet need to be tested for their authenticity

B. Opinions based on facts.

C. Opinions which stand against the facts.

Out of these three, as we see only the third category is dangerous. Even then, it becomes dangerous essentially only when a person does not realize that it is merely and opinion and bases his/her/someone else’s whole life on such opinions.

May be the following can help:

1. It becomes our moral responsibility to get to know the facts before build an opinion about anything.
2. We verify and ask ourselves if our opinion/s are based on a fact, if it is not based on a fact, then is it against a fact?
3. What will be the likely consequences of the actions that we take based on such opinions which currently stand against the facts?
4. We should take the responsibility incase the consequences of the actions which come from the third category opinions are highly undesirable.

For example: If Rakesh and Rima go through an amniocentesis and find out that their unborn child is abnormal and if he/she is born, will never be able to live a normal and healthy life (a fact). But they feel that terminating this pregnancy is not something that they want to do for emotional reasons (an opinion). It would be better if they ask themselves the third and the fourth questions at least!

Finally it is worth noting that this post is an “A” category opinion !! J J

Understanding the meaning of "SAAT- PHERE" (seven steps) in a Hindu marriage

I was born in a Hindu family. Since my childhood I have always seen various Hindu customs and rituals being performed. I have been to so many Hindu marriages of my relatives and have seen the same or similar rituals being performed in all of them. But I rarely understood the deep meaning that these rituals are supposed to have, the reason why they are being performed since ages. I rarely saw the pundit (The priest) explaining the meaning and significance of these customs while being performed.

I am not very aware of customs and rituals because personally I follow the religion of “Humanity”. For me the customs and rituals are less important as long as the person follows a “good character” (which all religions advise, though what constitutes a good character varies) and understands his or her own potential as a Human being.

Since I feel a social responsibility to do certain rituals, then it becomes my responsibility to first understand them beforehand because I will hate to follow them blindly! Keeping in mind that my own marriage ceremony is to be held in near future, I began to search for the answers for the questions I had in mind regarding the rituals that I will be expected to perform for my marriage.

Hinduism being a symbolic religion, most rituals and ceremonies have a symbolic meaning to them therefore, just performing the act is going to make no sense until the meaning of it is well understood. Anything done without this understanding, is supposed to be “Blind Faith”. Many times when I asked the seniors for the meaning of a particular ritual they would either get offended of they would say things like “It is to be done because it’s being done since ages and we are sure there is a meaning to it”. Yes, I am sure there is a meaning to it, but my concern is that anything done without its proper knowledge can be even harmful….for example: How do you know you are doing it the right way? If it’s done without reasoning and understanding then, it is blind faith and hardly has any meaning!!

Originally the Hindu-Vedic systems were very scientific in nature. They even did not discriminate between men and women, however this practice is very prevalent now by the people who do not fully comprehend the religion. I attempted to understand the meaning and significance of what I will be doing in a few months. “Saptpadi” OR “Saat Phere” which translates as “seven steps” in English is considered to be the most important custom of a Hindu marriage (and now I know why), so I dedicate this article to the same.

The “VARMALA” OR “Jaimala” is the ritual where the bride and the groom put garlands around each other’s necks. This signifies that the two persons have chosen each other as life partners. This is essentially a ritual performed by “Kshatriyas” (The warrior caste) in ancient times, however now I see it being performed in all Hindu marriages I attend.

Another very important ritual is “Kanya Daan” Which translates as “giving away one’s daughter to the groom [“Kanya means girl and “Daan” means “donation”].This ritual is performed by the father of the bride or the father figure in his absence. The groom recites Sanskrit Shloks about love. [Shlok is a small stanza usually in Sanskrit]

But the most important of all Hindu marriage rituals is “SAPTAPADI” referring to “SAAT PHERE” in general Hindi now-a-days. This ritual is the core of the whole marriage ceremony and couple is considered as married just by performing this ritual alone.

Saat Phere:

How it is done:

Some older person of the family ties a knot with one end of the bride’s clothing and one end of the groom’s clothing. Then they stand up to take seven rounds around the fire [called the Agni Kund in Hindi] one by one. These rounds are taken as the priest reads certain Sanskrit Shloks to bless the couple. The picture below shows the knot symbolizing the “Sacred wedlock”

The rationale:

“Fire” Or Agni is considered as Very pure and sanctified. Also, the Qualities of fire are such that, no matter how many times it is lit, yet it remains “immortal” and “young forever”. This is why I have seen people in almost all major religion of the world – Hindus, Muslims, Christians, and Buddhist and more… all use fire in one way or the other for their worship. Amazing!! How fire is considered important by multiple beliefs systems.

The term “Agni Pariksha” is commonly used in Hindi language which refers to “a very difficult exam”. Coming back to the point, because fire is considered to be so pure, immortal, young and sanctified, it is used as a symbol for the couple to solemnize their marriage with the seven promises. This is called “Agni Sakshi” which means “fire is the witness”. The promises thus made are considered to be immortal and the couple is expected to be MOST truthful and honest to each other in making these promises. Despite which, I am so sad to see so many promises being broken, where the wives are killed, beaten and tortured either psychologically or physically or both. And some husbands too!!

What are the seven promises: (Credit for this section goes to “Wikipedia”).

With the first phera, the couple invokes the Gods for the plenitudes of pure and nourishing food and a life that is noble and respectful.

With the second phera the couple prays for physical and mental strength and to lead a healthy and peaceful life.

The third phera is taken for the fulfilment of spiritual obligations. The Gods are invoked for blessing the couple with spiritual strength.

The fourth phera is taken for the attainment of happiness and harmony through mutual love and trust and a long joyous life together.

The fifth phera is taken to pray for the welfare of all living entities in the entire universe and for begetting noble children.

The sixth phera is for bountiful seasons all over the world. The couple prays for bountiful seasons and seeks that they may go through these seasons together, just as they would share their joys and sorrows.

With the last phera they pray for a life of understanding, loyalty, unity and companionship not only for themselves but also for the peace of the Universe.

In North Indian weddings, the bride and the groom say the following words after completing the seven steps:

"We have taken the Seven Steps. You have become mine forever. Yes, we have become partners. I have become yours. Hereafter, I cannot live without you. Do not live without me. Let us share the joys. We are word and meaning, united. You are thought and I am sound. May the night be honey-sweet for us. May the morning be honey-sweet for us. May the earth be honey-sweet for us. May the heavens be honey-sweet for us. May the plants be honey-sweet for us. May the sun be all honey for us. May the cows yield us honey-sweet milk. As the heavens are stable, as the earth is stable, as the mountains are stable, as the whole universe is stable, so may our unions be permanently settled.

Thanks for reading !!