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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Choosing a perfect Life Partner




We all need a life partner who can share the joys and sorrows of life with us. A life partner is a person who will occupy a very important place in our life. A person with whom we like to walk till the very end of the road.. We all want our life to be as close to "an ideal life" as possible and we all have our opinions about what an ideal life is. Because of the amount of  impact this person is going to have on our life, and the position he/she will hold for us, we want to be so sure that we find the best partner or should I say, a "perfect partner".

So what do we typically look for in a partner ?? Men and women have different parameters to consider in their prospective partners. Psychologists have spent years researching this topic and these are some of the points they concluded :

Most women predominantly get attracted to men who :

- Have power
- Are rich
- have a strong status in the society.
- are physically strong.

Most men predominantly get attracted to women :

- who are have a symmetric face.
- who show signs of good health
- who have a good waist to hip ratio :) (waists being narrower and the hips being broader).


 Let me also point out  that these selection factors that I mentioned above, happen in the heads of the people unconsciously, and they are not necessarily aware of such thoughts and processes.
Choices and preferences still vary from people to people. The more they are in an ideal (or at least imaginary ideal) positions, the higher the standards for their prospective life partners are likely to be.

So,we now know why women and beauty and men and power were overly paired together always !! :) But we also know that such a strong association which is done without complete conscious awareness, can lead to serious personality problems in some members of  society. This is just one reason why we need to look beyond perfection in people.

When we look at people as prospective partners, we are sure to find something in their personality which we dislike. We always have things about ourselves, our friends, family members, that we wish we could change. If we really look closely at people we know, how many of us can really claim to know a person who is perfect ?? Perfect in a sense, without ANY flaws ! I think most people will agree that finding such a person is only next to impossible !!

As I have always said, we all have this knowledge, but it not the knowledge but the awareness or "cognizance" that counts. Just like any change is difficult to accept a change to our marital status in the society, being associated to a new person too can sometimes be a little difficult for some people irrespective of the partner's social status. (here I am specially referring to arranged marriages).

There can be no perfect person, only near perfect matchmaking. How close the match is to perfection, depends largely on the two people involved in it.Therefore the threshold and meaning of perfection have to be seriously considered.
Wiser people will know this and will accept a person with his/her flaws so that they can also expect to be accepted the same way :) Wise people will learn this the hard way.. and there will still be others who will have so much of a problem learning this truth that, they will never be able to enjoy life to the fullest !.


Image courtesy : Google images

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